Anyone who knows me can attest to the fact that I smile (and laugh) a lot. I talk a lot too but that's not relevant to this post.
There are a few things; however, that cause me to wear a perm-a-grin. It is typically because I am so overwhelmed with a sense of peace or happiness. I also do not even realize how big the smile is until someone comments on it.
Before heading to church on March 1st, the kids and I noticed that the rain was slowly turning into the fattest flakes of snow we had ever seen. My little girl's reaction was "I hope it doesn't snow because then we can't go to church." The thought never crossed my mind. After all, church is my weekly therapy provided free of charge by God. How could I pass it up? I simply told her, "No way. We are going to church. Mommy needs it." :)
By the time we made it to the 1 o'clock service, the rain turned completely to snowflakes. Once we left the service, the snow was in full force (I think I even heard thunder). Instant perm-a-grin. There is just something about the falling of snow that is refreshing for me. It signifies a new beginning. Everything that was blemished before (like my front lawn) is covered with thick beautiful flakes. I always stop and stare at the falling snow. I do not know what it is about it. It puts me in a trance and gives me new energy.
My car had a thick covering of snow on it and after careful driving, we made it home safely. The kids hit each other with snowballs for a few minutes before we had to go in. The wind was picking up a little.
I received a small reminder that I needed to go back outside and make my snow angel so I could cross another thing off my list. Not wanting to feel like a failure for missing out on the opportunity I threw my jacket on minus the inside lining (not a smart idea, by the way) and went back outside with the kids. They quickly made their snow angels, which looked great. I passed the camera off to my daughter and my son decided to make another snow angel right in the middle of the last good spot (my spot).
I quickly laid down in the snow (half in the lawn and half on my driveway) and started to make my snow angel. The whole time (all 5 seconds of it) I said over and over, "It's so cold." At one point, though, I looked over at my son next to me and saw how completely content he was in the snow. He was giggling like crazy. My heart smiled. How awesome to be five years old and so completely without worry! If you have ever heard a child's laughter, then you know what I am talking about.
I remember the first time I ever saw my first real snow. It was Winter of 2002 and I was pregnant with my daughter. We got almost six inches at our house. I felt like a little kid at Christmas. That time, I was able to take my time with the snow angel (mostly because I had a little bit of a belly at that point and had a hard time getting up). It was perfect. I felt so happy in that moment. I was a few months from having my first child. My husband was so excited to watch me experience my first time in the snow and the thick white flakes made everything new again.
I am looking for that experience again. It is too easy to get caught up in all the little hassles in life. I definitely have a gift for ranting and raving at times. And when I get started, there is no stopping me. At this point in my life, I am ready for that thick blanket of white fluffy flakes to fall. To make everything new. To make everything pure again. I want it to remind me of all that I have, all that I am and give me hope for all that I will become. The time has come again for me to get that perm-a-grin. To feel that absolute sense of joy that I usually feel when the snow falls.
I do not expect it to come just because I am hoping for it. It is something that I need to work at as well. And it is something that will be all in God's time.
I was looking for a poem that might give a small glimpse into how I feel about snow and realized a great place to look would be in the Bible. I was right. The chapter from Isaiah below is such an awesome reminder for me to turn to the Lord when I need that new energy. That the snow returns to the heavens but not without first "watering the earth" to help it "bud and flourish" (Isaiah 55:10). The snow has fallen. Each day, I am getting closer to some sort of breakthrough. I feel like the flower who is going to bud. I am so excited... I've got a new reason to have a perm-a-grin. :)
Isaiah 55
Invitation to the Thirsty
1 "Come, all you who are thirsty,come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
2 Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.
3 Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.
4 See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
a leader and commander of the peoples.
5 Surely you will summon nations you know not,
and nations that do not know you will hasten to you,
because of the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel,
for he has endowed you with splendor."
6 Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
7 Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.
8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.
9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
13 Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."
TASK #48...COMPLETED 3/1
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